I had a hard time putting this one together. Often times topics are discussed where the discussion is led with positivity and empowerment and then there’s that “but”. That kind of dilutes the message. I just wanted to present my observation and leave the “but” out of this piece.
I had a moment listening to the Brilliant Idiots podcast. Hosts Charlamagne & Andrew spoke briefly on black women, mostly on how they are most confident people in the world but still carry a ton of baggage.
From Rihanna to the young lady who birthed “on fleek” , confidence is exuded.
I was brought up around mostly women. The women in my family are strong, resilient, confident and don’t take no shit.
The above-mentioned qualities are fighting with insecurity, feelings of inadequacy and being fed up. It’s crazy because the ones I leaned on most and sought help from the most were hurting and I never knew.
There is a perception that black women are ONLY strong. But it’s because they never showed weakness. I felt like my mother was Superwoman. When she’d get sick there was no sign of weakness, no day off. She kept it pushing. When my father and I got sick we were incapacitated.
We as men need to bring more to the table. If you gon’ step into that world with a woman make sure you are whole. Improve yourself and be a MAN.
We expect so much from a significant other because we were spoiled by whoever the primary mother figure was in our lives. Some were raised by their mother, some by their grandmother but there was always a strong woman at every stage of our life.
This is really just the tip of the conversation between the black man & black woman and restoring that bond. I could go deeper into my theories and observations but for the sake of brevity, I end here.