8/23/15 – “Bobby”
My Sister, Amanda Robinson, please share your story Love One:
I found out I was pregnant on July 16th, 2014, only three and a half months into my marriage. My husband and I always talked about having children one day, but I must admit when the day came that I learned I was going to be a mother I wasn’t very thrilled. I was terrified. I was shocked. In an instant, a thousand thoughts ran through my mind. My first thought was “Is this test right? Am I really pregnant?” Then I questioned if I was really ready to take on such a huge responsibility and life changing experience. I had to put all of those thoughts of uncertainty to the side and acknowledge the position that I was in. I had a husband who was there to share this journey with me and God to guide my footsteps through this journey.
In my first trimester, I was plagued by nausea that refused to leave. I couldn’t yet feel her move, but I spoke to her all the time. When I had my first sonogram, I was 7 weeks pregnant and my baby was so tiny I could barely see her little peanut shape on the monitor. I heard her heart beat for the first time and my heart melted. At that point, I knew that this was real. I was going to be a mother. I prayed with my baby, I sang to her (the best I could anyway), I talked to her, I played music for her. I wanted her to know just how much she was loved and how I anticipated her arrival.
My expected due date was March 18th, 2015. However, like most things in life, this is one thing that didn’t happen as expected. I woke up about 4am on February 17th, 2015 to use the bathroom and realized that something just wasn’t right. I called my midwife and she told me to head to the hospital and she would meet me there. After a quick test, we realized that my water was slowly breaking so my labor would need to be induced. I was told that I should expect my baby to arrive between 24-48 hours from then. I was terrified and excited. I received my first dose of medication to induce my labor at 2:15pm. By 5pm the pain really started to hit me. I wanted my birthing experience to be as natural as possible, which meant no medication to ease my pain, but it became unbearable. I was hooked up to machines to monitor my contractions and labor progress, and though my midwife told me that the pain I felt was only a fraction of how bad things would get, I thought there was no way I would make it without an epidural. If I was going to survive the next 24-48 hours, I would have some kind of relief. However, 24-48 hours turned into 9 hours and at 11:08pm, Yanaya Simone Robinson was born weighing 4 pounds 14 ounces. By the grace of God, I met my beautiful, healthy baby girl. She was born four weeks early but had all ten fingers, all ten toes, and fully functioning organs. I was grateful. Elated. Blessed.
After being the NICU (Neonatal Intensive Care Unit) for 48 hours, it was time to take her home. My husband had six weeks of paternity leave from his job and being home with my husband and my new baby was definitely some of the happiest days of my life. We were learning how to be parents together. Sometimes all we could do was just watch her and smile, in awe of God’s grace and this indescribable, incomparable blessing. I can remember the first diaper I changed, the first time she rolled over, and the first time she attempted to call me. She said “Bah Bah Bobby Bobby” unable to make the “m” sound and say “Mommy”.
It’s been almost six months now and there are still no words to describe the love, joy and satisfaction that comes with being a mother. It’s tiring. It’s hard work, and it takes much sacrifice. But none of that matters. Just to see her grow, smile and learn new things makes everything worth it. All the cliches about loving a child and being a parent are true. Every time I see her smile, my life feels complete. I pray for God’s continued guidance that I will teach her to first love Jesus Christ and make Him proud and walk in the greatness that I know He has created her to be.
Love is Love,